New Year Wishes!

The best year of my life so far comes to an end ;-). The last working day of the year and I would be off in a little while. Will be at chennai for the new year. I wouldnt really want to end the year with a severe viral infection, but this damn virus is very adamant! and i really dont like the feeling of my stomach after the antibiotics and also lose weight so fast.(yeah right, as if I'm very heavy)

Its been a great eventful year. Best things happened this year. A couple of things didnt go my way. It has brought in a lot of commitment and focus and with that, I hope to see myself

- as a successful CEO in a few years.
- and have a farm house in two years.
- sketch and paint more.
- learn to play the guitar well.
- and ofcourse globetrot more. But, it wouldnt be France and Venice this year. Yey, u guessed right. There is still time for it. Or probably would do more of roadtrips in India this year.

Heres wishing you all a great and prosperous year ahead !

Weekend !! -

- a long 18 hr journey by bus
- home made food from a long time (5 yrs) friend
- nice parathas at Chaitanya and good food at Herbs and Spices - a coupla restaurants basically
- caught a young lil girl opening the front zip of a Manequeen and laughing her brains out
- taken arnd the town
- curious and amusing thoughts on seeing Osho's Ashram
- coupla movies & lotsa cofee and ice tea
- BluffMaster, No Entry, Apaharan, and some Akshay, John Abraham flick
- lotsa yapping away
- peaceful, silent, contemplating moments - reading newspaper sipping tea or standing in the balcony watching the swimming pool below
- walk along the path of history - the very own place where Gandhi and others had lived - Aga Khan Palace
- loads of TV long into the night
- an amazing book - The curious incident of the dog in the night - Mark Haddon (a must read)
- chatting with the new comer(;-)) to the town DV and few others
- a very delayed flight(10.5hrs)
- a horrible infection - viral fever ( dont come near me ;-) ) and a painful injection at the back (grrrrrrrr) but a beautiful DR.ShilpaShetty *all smiles*
- a new bike (yet to be named - It is a HE and the color is Black...will post more of him soon!!!)

and now
loads of work :-((((

The curious incident of the dog in night-time

Very occasionally you come across a book that is so different from the rest. For example, The Alchemist by Paulo coelho introduced me to a very different style of writing. The nameless characters which stand outside while the content of the story takes the centrestage was an awesome piece of writing. In the cinema world, "Yuva"/"Ayutha Ezhuthu" again is a very different way of story telling - but even better was the original "Amores Perros".

I read this book - A curious incident of the dog in the night-time by Mark Haddon. Christopher, the autistic kid hates lies, being touched and fascinated with the world of numbers, and cannot understand jokes/metaphors. He likes puzzles and decides to play detective and solve the puzzle of the death of the dog who is killed by a pitch fork. In this journey, what he would unearth is what forms the crux of the story!

The book made me look life from an autistic perspective. Sometimes, i felt autistic myself. Thats how the descriptions were. The workings of an autistic brain and the simpler ways of looking at life with profound wisdom in the lines. This book is a must read. When my manager/friend gave me this book smiling - "You would surely be interested in this", I didnt think I would like it this much.

Books immediately in my list are

Winning (presently consuming)
For matrimonial purposes
five point someone (borrowed)
The Mythical Man Month - (highly suggested by my collegue at work for Software Engineering)

hmmmm

No one remembers when you are right and no one forgets when you are wrong.

The best of the opportunities lies in the worst of the adversities.

Cosnuming three things -

By the River Pidera, I sat and wept - Paulo Coelho
The Saint, The Surfer and the CEO - Robin Sharma
Winning - Jack Welch

And yes The Search still continues, but its becoming more amusing and revealing. And it surprises me everyday as I try to find more and more.

In search...

End of a dinner Saga

Today will be the tenth day since I happened to meet Ms.X for dinner and we have dined out every night. It had been nice and pleasant. And like all things, the dinner saga of 10 days comes to an end, because I have cancelled quite a few engagements to go home. A registered and important course that I wanted to attend, Viewing a business quiz and shopping for my house and a promised game of tennis are some of the engagements that I have decided to cancel and go home, because after a very long time, I have a forceful desire to go home. Theres another storm brewing in chennai and I think I would spend the weekend, sitting at home, sipping a coffee with a nice book in my hand, next to the open window, hearing the incessant chatter of the rain, smelling the wet earth and my nephew Mukil playing on my stomach, and kicking his legs in the air.

And there is an invite to attend the culturals at a friend's college. Its been so long since I went to a college. Reminds me of my college days and apparently, there is a light music show as well as participation from my own college. Should be interesting if rain permits!

:-0

I had to get my car back from my friend. I went to his office and returned his bike. I got into find his shoulder bag in the front. I reminded him to take his funky bag. And there he goes, along with the funky bag, he took out a lunch carrier. No, nothing wrong with carrying a lunch carrier. I take my lunch whenever I cook (yeah, and when there are leftovers from prev nights ;-) ).....But to see your long time friend with whom you have roamed arnd for years, with the feeling you wld never be so grown up and then see him with thick gold chain and a gold bracelet on his hand announcing his marriage, and a lunch carrier with an indifferent face from which you do not make out if he is actually sad/happy at his fate, now, thats scary....Is this all marraige reduces you to ? LOL!!! In that case, I prefer to stay single. Well, I guess, this atleast will never happen with me ;-) and if such a day happens, I will erase this blog entry and request you to clearly erase from your memories too, lest you will embarass me ;-)

Life is beautiful !

The world is such a nice place to live in or atleast my apartment. On one side is an elderly couple, presumably from North of India (bcos I only spoke in Hindi with them) who are so worried about me staying all alone in such a big apartment and who thinks I'm such a nice bachelor who doesnt bring the apartment down with noise *hehehe* - assumptions they have and who invariably asks me about my well being even if I had met her 30 mins earlier and had replied "Awesomely well!". On the other side, is a young couple who have this new born, ok, a few months old kid Anirudh, who just reminds me of my own nephew Mukil everytime I greet him. His smile is infectious. And our apartment security, who is always enquiring about if I need some help, milk/washing the car/paper/cable TV/cook. Last night, he was like

"Dinner ho gaya kya?" (Had your dinner?)
"haan." - me (yes)
"Kudh cook karte ho kya?. Cook chahiye?" (Do you need a cook?)

Well, explained him and came home carrying a new gift that Ms.X had given me last night.*that was 9th day of dinner* Well, I like receiving gifts,*ahem ahem, point to note* but alas, only a few friends of mine give me *sob sob*. Havent received many, but again, I dont know I'm used to giving gifts than receiving it. And to receive it from someone new was surprising and that too a cute little Speaker, subwoofer system. That was quite an amount to give a gift to someone with a reasoning, listen to songs without hanging your CD player anymore ;-) !

Gifts Accepted with a big heart and loads of bear hugs, kisses and wishes!

? or Y

Tried to locate a new restaurant last night to try out the food. WE went to this place called, hmm..if my memory serves me right, its "Filling Station" or something like that...And the big byline was "Mulit Cuisine Family Restaurant". We entered and to our dismay, the whole restaurant was crowded with gang of men, and cloudy with smoke. An utter disappointment and came out immediately.
After our dinner(It was Curry Leaf again ;-( ), we decided to take a walk - oh, nothing in particular but a walk with nothing much to discuss. But are there any real dearth of topics on Earth? ;-) It was a clear sky and gazing at the stars, we tried to locate the
"SapthaRishi Mandal". Well, I dont know what the constellation in English is termed, but its a collection of seven stars closer to each other in the form - thats exactly where the problem started. I said in the form of a "?" she said, its in the form of a "Y". So what do you see when you see the stars?
A "?" or "Y"

The Awakening

Dedicated to all the cancer patients and my inspiration Lance Armstron and my Mom



They had been trying to reach him for the last 24 hours in vain. No one knew where he had gone. It was his mom's first chemosession the next morning after the operation. They did not have time anymore to search for a brooding drunkard over a lost girlfriend.

Ravi woke up to the sunrise seeping through the doors of his car. He realised his head was spinning from the hangover of last night's drinks. He tried to look at the time and it was 12:45 PM. He got and sat in the car cursing himself. He had to go home and then try to get back to work. He was feeling miserable.

He reached home to find that his mom had been admitted to the hospital for ChemoTherapy. He was the talk of the neighbours about how his mom, Vasantha did not deserve such a coward and loser son. He went to the hospital. His sister scolded him for having absconded in times of trouble. He felt sick in his stomach. He called up his manager and applied for two days leave and promised his sister to stay back in the hospital and take care of his mom.

Late that night, Ravi opened his eyes to the cough of his mom. He switched on the light to see a fragile and aging woman who had brought him into this world trying to throw up whatever she can yet unsuccessfully. The chemo was taking its toll. He held out his hand and took her vomit in his hands. In all that suffering, tears rolled down vasantha's eyes. He was the only hope she had always lived for. She wanted to see him happy before cancer took her away. He washed his hand and came back. He helped her lie down and sat beside her. She fell asleep tiring. He stoked her chest for some relief. His hands trembled at the feeling. She had undergone a breast cancer operation and her breasts had been cut off to remove the cancerous tissue. What once was his feeding temple was a barren land. Tears rolled down his eyes. He stroked her head and with him came streaks of gray hair. The chemo had taken its toll. He felt like a fool. Here is a person who has seen him through all life's adversities and in her moments of crisis, he had backed off like a coward longing for a heartless female. He had read about chemotherapy and how all the injection of the same tears the veins with pain and how all the cell reproduction is stopped and its side effects. He saw it first hand. It was nothing to what his pain was. He promised that night, to give up his brooding and whining and dedicate his life to the lady who has taught him to walk. It was his turn to return the favor and he wouldn’t succumb this time. Everyone in this world can wait, or get lost. He wouldn’t care anymore. All he wanted to do was to bring the first lady of his life back to this world from the deadly clutches of an arrogant disease.

It dawned beautifully the next morning as he watched the sun rise in the far horizon spreading its light standing next to the window.

hmmm

Its been a long time since I visited a blog and kinda hooked on to it for quite some time at a stretch and I did it today at THIS blog

Reason the places this blogger had visited are some of the ones that are in my list...
My ....I so want to go to the Alps, France & Venice (with my lover/wife if ever that happens), spain for the festivals, - ok fine, in short Europe !!!

*sigh* needs some more hardwork from me before I can do it.

ReUnited !!!

Me is reunited back with my lovey dovey car back. I gave my friend's Pulsar to get back my car and she so damn needs a service. Got to get it done early next week, the first thing. Poor she. Missed her and the drives with her! It was a pleasure to drive her back to office this morning listening to the beats of Yuva !!!

Now its time to get,set, go to work.

;- ) update !!!

Well,
I'm scared the shit if someones informing Ms.X about me.
me is out on a dinner again ;-) and trust me, I didnt call her for dinner ;-). I was just planning to and just then a call comes! Puts up some smile on me again!

This is gonna be a record break. Its been consecutive 8th day for dinner together. We just celebrated a week last night by visiting CasaPicolo! I have never done anything like this before !!!

:-(

Its just the fourth day and my coach has asked me not to enter the gym today. The last two days, I have been having an awesome mood and an inclination to be my best and today, I'm banned from entering the gym and I feel my worst. Do you believe this? He actually and literally ordered me not to step into the gym *sob sob*. Reason he said, I have been doing a little too much of everything than he said and unless my muscles take rest, I would hurt rather than becoming fit. True. I know. And the damned Tennis court in office is so crowded ;-( That leaves me with the only option of calling Ms.X for dinner (well, hope I dont get rejected) or stay back and complete some of my assignments ;-( but that sounds an option. I better work for the money I'm paid. No one pays for nothing.

???

I dont understand this. Why does it have to happen that someone who knows you for quite a long time suddenly decides to only misunderstand you in all aspects, howmuch ever you try not to let that happen. Is something completely wrong with the way I'm conveying or is it they dont want to see the truth at all? or atleast even attempt to? Why is it that you really want them to understand who you are finally? Why does it have to matter to you whether they understand or not? And what difference does it make if they dont even seem to care a damn about you? or atleast pretend so? Is it love, care or what the F it is? What can you do in such situations? All you can do is just be calm and patient, I guess. And probably move far away from them as much as you can.

Iris

I read a new blog today - eclectic resonance - and I saw a few lines that reminded me of this song on my CD. Its the first song on my list and am just hooked onto it from my Sony CD Man at work here ;-)

And I don’t want the world to see me ’cause I don’t think that they’d Understand
Ah !!! The cries of my inner mind for having been misunderstood a whole lot of times ;-( But, after a while you hit a state where you are like "who the F cares? ...Its your life that goes on !!!


And I’d give up forever to touch you
’cause I know that you feel me somehow
You’re the closest to heaven that i’ll
Ever be
And I don’t want to go home right now

And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
’cause sooner or later it’s over
I just don’t want to miss you tonight

And I don’t want the world to see me
’cause I don’t think that they’d
Understand
When everything’s made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And you can’t fight the tears that ain’t
Coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know you’re alive

And I don’t want the world to see me
’cause I don’t think that they’d
Understand
When everything’s made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And I don’t want the world to see me
’cause I don’t think that they’d
Understand
When everything’s made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And I don’t want the world to see me
’cause I don’t think that they’d
Understand
When everything’s made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am

A show on NDTV

Got this from my sis in a mail....
DISCLAIMER
Authenticity not verified !! Check out NDTV for more details.

Tomorrow Narayanan Murthy and Bill Gates are being interviewed by Prannoy Roy and the topic of discussion is ‘Changing India’.

This airs at 9:30 PM IST tomorrow on NDTV.

In the city ...

I met her first in the bus from chennai to bangalore. It was one of those rarest of times, when a guy's seat is next to a girl's and she doesnt make a fuss. I got into the bus and was about to take the window seat when she asked
"Hey, can I take the window seat?" "Oh well, why?" I wanted to ask.
The enthusiasm in her voice and the fact that all I wanted was to catch up on some sleep. And window seat was the last of my botheration. I parked my ass in the seat.
"My name is X" she said.
"Hi, me is Bala", thus the conversation started. and I seriously do not know when I slept. Well, tired in the mind and body I had zapped when she was speaking to me and I was chided about it the next morning.

Occasional mails and rare calls, we were in touch.

DAY I

It's been a long time since I took a girl out for a dinner. My mobile rang at around 6:00 PM.

"Hey, Remember me, how are you doing?"
"Hey, hows you, me is getting along with da world"
"You sound low." A pause and then "Can you have dinner with me tonight?"
"The bill is on me" I said.
"Are you trying to impress me? When will you guys change? I can pay for mine!" she said
"Well, if you insist, can you pay for mine too?"I paused.
She sighed.

Our conversations have always ended in arguments. But yes, not in fights though. And another constant argument we have is that I, a techie does not know anything whereas, she, a HR knows everything. I guess its the problem between a man / woman than a techie/HR !!!

"The choice of restaurant is yours then!"
"South-Indian, North-Indian, chinese, continental, pizzas, pasta?"
"did you work as a bearer before?" she asked.
"No, but I will soon own a restaurant though"
"I need some hot hot idlis."
"Ok, I actually do not want to take you to Sukh Sagar and stand and talk"
"Ok...lets make it continental. Do you get sizzlers?"
"Oui...Thats moi fav too. Lets hit CasaPicolo. Can drop you home from there"

And after a long time, I had real quality time. No pretense, no mind games, just plain yapping with philosophical statements from my troubled mind. Reminded me of earlier days with someone, who has by now decided to part our ways as friends. Well, thats how she wanted it. I just had to let her go. Sharing a couple of things about college, school, etc etc. It was fun. I paid the bill. We had to walk back to my car. And Bangalore these days are cold. I had left my jacket in the car. She persisted that she wldnt wear her jacket unless I stop shivering. Crazy girl. I dropped her home.
"Wait for a minute, I'll be back." She said.
she gave me a handful of CDs, of Laurel & Hardy, Friends - 8th season, and Carry On series.
I guess she noticed I was low in my mind. She didnt ask anything though.
That night, I was all smiles with L&H tickling me all the time.

DAY II

Customary GM notes and Great day wishes.

It was 6:00 PM. I took out my mobile.
"Hi, R you busy?"
"hmmm...not much why?"
"Can I buy you some hot idlis?"
"not before 8:30 though, is that fine? and I need to leave by 9:45"
"Perfect"
We met at Sukh Sagar and I never have gone to the AC hall there ;-).
"Well, I guess it isnt your treat again today" She said.
"That that man, that that money. applies for that that woman too." I said.

Another hour of quality dinner with non stop nonsense of everything. I dont have a car. I have given it to my friend. His FIL had come down and he wanted it. So, I said, I'll walk her down to her house. I carried her laptop and I had no clue how those 10-15 mins of walk was over. I wanted to walk more. But she had mentioned she wanted to leave earlier today.
"Hey, thanks for the evening." I said handing over the laptop bag.
"You give me a feeling it was only customary walk"
"No, I really wanted to walk you down."
"No, I just had a feeling"
I bid Good Night and started walking back to catch an auto. I messaged her that I really wanted to walk her down and I appreciate her time for me.

I got down before my house on the main road and was walking down when she called up.
"Hey, watcha doing?"
"walking down towards the house"
"Well, couldnt you have just done that with me here?"
I burst out laughing.
"I thought you wanted to leave early"
"Yep, I wanted to leave @ 9:45 so that I can walk down with you and reach by 10:15, but you left me home at 9:40 itself."
"Well, I dont read minds."
"Should I say you are Stupid"
"Ah there goes, man and a woman's world of differences"

It was another 15 mins before I kept the phone down. Well, settled down with the rest of Carry On series and slept off !

It was the start and have been out on dinner atleast a couple of times after that which ends up in a nice walk after dropping her !

Salutations

How many people have you taken inspiration from? For me, there have been many. But this man standing here,

has been one of my greatest motivator. A man of awesome determination, will and courage who has seen the death in his door and showed fingers to it. Now, why do I write about him today? Bcos when I bought "The Zahir", I suggested my friend to buy, "Its not about the bike: My Journey Back to Life". And when I had a relook at the book last night, I rememembered that I had almost forgotten what I had learnt from this awesome human spirit. I first came to know about him in 2003 when I accidentally got hold of this book at my friend's place. But the more I learnt about him, the more I admired and respected him and behind the good looking man, is an unequalled human spirit.

Waking up to Sunrise and Coffee !

I like waking up to Sunrise. The gradual early morning radiant warmth seeping in thru your windows is such a pleasant thing to happen. Waking up to a pleasant morning with your love next to you, then sharing a cup of coffee in the balcony with the morning papers thrown in - thats bliss and heaven. Obviously, I like my bedroom to be east facing. Reminds me of the times when we used to sit and discuss about how we would design and setup the house later in our life. Nice times, they were. In Bangalore, I had rented out a two bedroom house and I havent yet set the house. Its been over a month and a half now and I havent set it up at all. I was sleeping in one of the bedrooms and the other was locked always. I did not even look at what I had in the form of a house. Last evening, I brought a new friend home and I had to show the mess I had created and thats when I was pointed out that bedroom - an east facing small cozy little bedroom. I realized how much I had been missing. Cleaned up the room and shifted my bed to the this room. I wake up at 6:30 in the morning generally. The room has no curtains yet. Therefore, from 6:00, the morning radiance started seeping in through the glass windows and hit my eyes. When I opened my eyes, it was like this magic hallow of light all around. I went in, made a cup of steaming coffee and stood by the window. A smile escaped from my enchanted mind.

A busy bee?

CasaPicolo - Dinner
Sukh Sagar (Ah, the AC Hall) - Dinner
Aanghan - Dinner
Jayanthi Sagar - Dinner
Iskcon
MGRoad - Artist walkaway - Bangalore Habba(stalls open till Dec 11 on MGRoad Promenade)
Garuda Mall
Pizza Hut - Lunch
A Pathetic tamil movie
Curry Leaf - Dinner.

This is how my life style has been over the last 5 days with last six in the list just on Sunday alone. Whoof... My friend had taken my car to take around his FIL (how ppl want to impress?). Infact, I had got the car just a day before and no one else than me knew I brought it to Bangalore ;-(( . He had promised his bike -a week old brand new Pulsar and I happened to get it on Saturday evening and since then I have done close to 160 kms within 24 hours inside Bangalore. Hola....Dont I justlike zipping past in bikes...Bikes are always my favourites over cars !!! No offense to my dear car, here !!!
And on saturday, one of my "Pettai buddy" had come down. We call him "appu". We caught after long time, cooked together and had lunch and zapped off like "KumbaKarna" !!!It was a fun afternoon.

BTW, Bangalore Habba - An annual event to celebrate Art has started. I missed the street shows and theatre events, but hey, there is an artist walkway on the MGRoad from Dec2 - Dec 11 from 9AM to 7 PM on the promenade. Catch up if you want, its interesting. Some real nice works are available, of terracotta, paintings etc. Also, happened to catch up with antique cars parked on MGroad on Sunday. Nice to see some jaguar and old benz ;-) and really really old Royal Enfield Bullets !!! Will post the pics soon.

More about all these restaurants and their reviews and a new person I had gone out with for dinner later.

The Zahir !

I bought this book last afternoon and have just started. Well, the main character in this novel had lost his wife, for unknown reasons and trying to reason it out and I lost someone recently, again for unknown reasons, but I dont want to search for reasons though. Seems there are misunderstandings - undoable ones at that. Seems life has to go on all by myself, again the same old feeling of emptiness, of broken promises and unfulfilled dreams. I hate having come back from Canada. There isnt a minute when I dont think of going back. DreamVendor had pointed to something similar. Suddenly people have changed. I came back to no one, when I believed everyone was there waiting for me. Ah, our own beliefs. How we lie to ourselves? I didnt expect to be received by many people, but "ONE" person for sure and it was disappointing. I reach home and put all the luggages and play with my dog and go and sit and watch TV, yet, no one had even looked at whats happening. I guess they didnt believe I was actually there. Then a lot of customary questions , but I guess I was more engrossed with myself and my thoughts and I ignored them. Not to blame them. And two months later, I still feel alone and relationships becoming more customary. But yes, over these two months, as a family we have faced many difficulties too and I'm kinda glad that we have held together more as a family but for me, theres something lacking. Someone's absence makes it all the more difficult to handle it. But yes, I've got used to it these days. And am seeing myself starting to enjoy the stay alone here! But is there an other choice? Well, I guess, I'm indeed a "lonely walker" in this journey! but that doesnt deter me from enjoying the fun !!! ;-) ! Well, I'm planning to party in Goa for the New Year after reading the latest issue of Outlook Traveller.
Anyone interested to join me, let me know, How about ya DV? When r u here?

Read this from Divya's blog.

In every human life,
there are some moments when one is sad and depressed
Frustrated from every zone of life,
And feels like leaving everything & going away
And Life Goes on..

Some moments in which
one is wrapped with tensions
one wants to get out of them
and fly high in the sky
But cant run away,
and life goes on..

Some moments in which,
one who is adored hurts your sentiments,
one needs support, a shoulder to cry on,
But doesnt find one,
and life goes on..

Some moments in which one gets tired of life
or so intensely hurt that one wants to die
one wishes to end his life
at that very moment,
and life goes on..

And in every human life a day arrives
When you have to put an end to a journey called "life"
And then people around cry
and show that they were concerned

Then the question arises
Do they wait for one's death..,
To care, To understand , To show their love
If so, then wait till death and until then

Life Goes On . . .


I guess my mind is wandering as it usually does these days when I stand on my beautiful lovely terrace and take a breath of fresh air - a fresh lease of life !!!


This is no review. But I liked The Alchemist as well as Manual of the Warrior of Light by the same author. Yet to grab hold on Eleven Minutes though.



A small excerpt -
Suffering occurs when we want other people to love us in the way we imagine we want to be loved, and not in the way that love should manifest itself – free and untrammelled, guiding us with its force and driving us on.

Time for change, aye !!!

Dreams I believe are insights into yourself. And death in dreams, they say, is a reflection of some major changes in your life, probably a emotional balance or change in attitude towards life.


I always wanted to have a honourable death and I was more than happy when I had one in my dream. My dream goes on like this.


I'm just walking hand in hand with a girl and am in a jeans and a white spotless, vest (well, will come to this later) - yeah the one in the ads kind on a wide open ground, unbelievably huge open space of grass. I'm all laughing and smiling oblivious to everything. Suddenly, there are fighter planes coming in and they start shooting. Thats when I realise, there is a whole lot of people around me running helter skelter and I start running too. And I suddenly see, a bunch of people of my side coming with guns and start shooting and Hola, its a war. The war is getting intense and I take shelter in a corner. Those who are left gather around a huge mound kind. Its night and we know there is going to be one more attack. We are on top of a mountain peak. And we see a enemy camp at a far distance. The commander adderesses the soldiers who have given all hope of surviving the next attack that only way is to destroy that camp and it just is not possible. We all fear and wait, the civilians amongst us are scared.

Its a silent night and suddenly the attack starts again. But its more fierce than ever. Even the civilians have taken to fight - last resort to save their own lives. Its blood and gore everywhere. I get hurt and I see myself bleeding. The white vest is full of blood on the chest(I told you in the begining. It was pure and clean). Just then, I see an invader killing a young baby. I beat him to death. And get onto a plane. I'm feeling hurt, and its paining like hell. I scream at this insane nonsense. All I want is to stop this. The blood is gushing out of me and people are screaming. I fly a fighter plane loaded with ammunition and crash land into the enemy's camp. Before I land, I see my own people far off and I smile. I feel happy they will be safe from now on. I also feel sad I cant see them be happy. Theres the sun coming behind from the mountains. And I feel a pain pass thru me as I close my eyes and fall down face on earth!

Crazy,weird, interesting, scary. You bet !

@ work

The meeting was at 11:30. It was supposed to be addressed to the new set of team that we have recruited and had not had a formal introduction yet. And I had ignored my Outlook remainder 15 mins back preparing for a presentation. It was 11:36 AM when I scolded myself. I like to be very punctual anytime as I hate making others wait. Because I hate to wait myself unless I can do that in a beach ;-)

I ran into the conference room when I heard my manager addressing the whole team,
"Ok, For the late comers, I start again. As I told you, we are starting on a new project which we are banking on for more revenues with a fierce competetition from other vendors who are proving to be more tough. And the person you see here walking in late is Bala, also called Balaji Saranathan who will spear head and give all of us direction in this project in the role of a Tech Architect."

Well, all I wanted to do was to go and hang myself !!!

My manager also a good friend of mine for sure is a nice person with a sense of humour. All I said was "Thanks a lot, for the honest introduction. Well, sorry guys, I had acutally lost my direction to reach here bcos from the mail, *I looked at my manager* I had no clue which wing of this building this conference room was. And our own techie problems too...I was working on this presentation, when the ever famous, or probably notorious Windows went hanging on me before I cld save the presentation and my Outlook cld not connect to our ever burdened mail-server. Techie life is quite difficult huh! "I exclaimed.

My First post !

Lets start the blog with one of Little Johnny jokes...Boy, dont I just love them...Ok, this aint a naugthy one, its a regular one.

A mailman walked down the street and saw Little Johnny playing in a pile of shit, had it between his fingers and smeared over his body.

The mailman asked him what he was doing and Johnny looked up and said, "Making a Mailman".

This pissed the mailman off, he went up the street and saw a fireman. He told the fireman what the boy was doing and what a smart ass the kid was, the fireman said that he would have a talk with the boy.

The fireman walked up to Little Johnny and asked him what was he doing playing in pile of shit, Johhny looked up and said, "Making a Fireman."

This pissed the fireman off, he left to tell a cop. The cop said that he would have a talk with the boy. The cop asked Little Johnny, "What are you doing, playing with a pile of shit?"

Little Johnny looked up and said nothing.

The cop said, "You told the mailman and the fireman that you were making a fireman and a mailman, why don't you tell me that you are making a cop."

Little Johnny looked up and without a grin said, "I ain't got enough shit".